Real Estate Jokes

The funniest day of the year has arrived. In honor of April Fool’s Day, here are a few real estate jokes to take your mind off that housing market stress.

Seller to Agent: You’ve done such a great job describing my house in your real estate listing that I’ve decided to keep it!


Agent: Why do you have your front door leading right into the dining room?

Seller: So my relatives won’t have to come all the way inside.


A broker was dismayed when a brand new real estate office, much like his own, opened up next door and erected a huge sign which read BEST AGENTS.

He was horrified when another competitor opened up on his right and announced its arrival with an even larger sign reading LOWEST COMMISIONS.

The broker panicked, until he got an idea. He put up the biggest sign of all over his own office. It read MAIN ENTRANCE.


Home sick is what you feel every month when the mortgage is due.


If you want to know exactly where the property line is, just watch your neighbor cut the grass.


Why didn’t the hipster real estate agent show the oceanside mansion?

It was too current.


How do you save a drowning real estate agent?

Take your foot of his head.

Negotiating Tips For Sellers, Wilmington NC

Negotiation is an important tool of the real estate business. To be a successful home seller you should have a basic understanding of negotiation methods, knowing the motivation of the other party and adapting to their style. You can strengthen your position as a home seller, by following these four negotiation tips.
 
1. Get your home into top condition. If your home is on the market with obvious defects such as paint, repairs, cleanup, carpets and landscaping, you can be certain prospective buyers will either not look at it, or if they do and they make an offer, it will be low.
 
Examine your home carefully. If you spot anything that a buyer can criticize, your negotiating position will be weakened. For example, if your home has peeling paint, you can be sure buyers will lower their offer by much more than a paint job would actually cost you. To negotiate from a strong position, always get your house painted inside and out before putting it on the market. See Nilesh Jethwa’s  
home staging program for more information on preparing your home for sale.
 
2. Know the market value of your home. After getting your home in the best possible condition, improve your negotiating position by determining the true market value of your home. One way is to hire a professional appraiser to evaluate your home and provide an expert opinion of the market value. The cost will be several hundred dollars for a complete appraisal, depending on the size of your home and the difficulty of appraising it. Choose an appraiser who is properly licensed and is experienced in your area.
 
Another way to determine the market value of your home is to interview several real estate agents about listing it for sale. As part of their listing presentation, each agent will prepare a written “comparative market analysis.” This report will show the recent sales prices of similar nearby homes as well as the list prices of other homes currently on the market. By comparing the reports submitted by the agents, and by checking out the comparables they use, you’ll be able to determine the market value of your home. Be sure to throw out any inflated price opinion given to you by an agent who is trying to “buy” the listing.
 
3. Relax and be patient. Another way of stating this rule is, “The one who cares the least, wins.” For example, if you must sell your home quickly because of a job transfer or to avoid a pending foreclosure, buyers will take advantage of your vulnerable situation. Give yourself plenty of time by putting your home on the market early. Sellers who get the top prices for their residences are those who have their homes in excellent condition and who do not have to sell it by a deadline.
 
They can afford the “I don’t care” attitude, so they only have to sell if they get the price and terms they really want. A good real estate agent will support you when you take this position even if it takes a little longer to sell your.

 

Posted by Nilesh Jethwa Wilmington, NC Real Estate

Nilesh Jethwa is a local real estate agent in Wilmington, NC. If you would like to contact Nilesh Jethwa or receive his free monthly market reports please click here!

The State of the Market: There is a Silver Lining..

The State of the Market: There is a Silver Lining…
If you’ve picked up a newspaper, flicked on a TV or tuned into talk radio recently, you have experienced your share of opinions and predictions about the real estate market, but here are the facts.
AFFORDABLITY IS HIGH
The Housing Affordability Index measures the ability of a typical American family to qualify for a mortgage based on the median-price for an existing single-family home. A score of 100 indicates that a typical family would have the exact amount required based on a 20% down payment and monthly payment of no more than 25 % of their household income.Currently, the index is at 135.2, which means the average American family not only can afford to purchase a home, but also will have excess money for living expenses. Another upside, highly desirable real estate such as Wilmington, Wrightsville Beach, and surrounding area’s are becoming more affordable.
SELECTION IS VAST
With more homes on the market, homebuyers can be more selective than in previous years. During the recent market boom, Limited availability and high prices resulted in many people making offers on homes due to fear of being left out of the market. However, in this buyers market, houses hunters can Afford to take their time and make a choice they are fully comfortable with.
THE UPSWING CONTINUES
Continuing the trend of increased existing home sales, 2009 is expected to produce an additional 6.6Percent increase in home sales. 2009 will be among on the strongest transaction years in history with an estimated 5.74 transactions. This New Year is also projected to boost new home sales to more than 600,000 transactions.Existing homes sales prices are also expected to increase by 3.7 percent in 2009, with new home sales increasing by 4 percent.
Source: National Association of Realtors

Posted by Nilesh Jethwa Wilmington, NC Real Estate
to contact Nilesh Jethwa click here!

Measuring The Value Of Your Home….

Whether buying, selling or refinancing, you want to determine a fair price for you home.
How do you know when fair is fair?

Having worked with many buyers and sellers in the Wilmington, Leland, Hampstead, and Castle Hayne area. This is a subject that is always brought up, and rightfully so. I truly believe that it is imperative for a seller and buyer to always have a complete picture of their local market. A Comparative Market Analysis also know as CMA is an important tool that can help you determine the estimated value of your property by comparing “apples to apples.” Since market value is determined by what a willing-and-able buyer will pay, a CMA can establish market value by comparing it to similar properties.

 

 If you are a seller, A CMA Can help you Determine:
 *Recent selling prices for homes similar to yours.
• The length of time these homes were on the market before they sold, and the length of time it will likely take for your home to sell.
• The homes you would be “competing with” should you decide to put your home on the market right away.

If you are a buyer, A CMA can help you decide:
• What to offer on a listing you want to buy

If you are refinancing:
• A CMA will give you some indication of what to expect when you have your home formally appraised.
What to look for in a CMA:
To get a complete picture of you local real estate market, have a real estate professional bring you up to speed with a CMA. The data in the CMA report should include:

* Currently available property. This means your “competition”. Remember that how you price your home relative to the competition is critical to your success. It’s good idea to visit open houses in your area to see how your home compares aesthetically.

* Pending Sales. These sales represent the most recent sales activity and will serve as “benchmarks” for the price of your home. When analyzing this data, your real estate agent will likely disregard rumors about homes selling for inflated sales prices. The actual sales price, which might not be made public until after the sale closes, could be quite lower than anticipated.

* Sales that occurred within the last 6 months.Your real estate agent will analyze these sales to determine current marketing conditions, but if the market is changing rapidly, he or she might shorten the time frame to three or four months. For each listing in your CMA, your real estate agent might find out how long it took to find a buyer for the home and if the listings took months to sell, or if the seller had to lower their price to attract a buyer. This category should include only listings that have “closed,” that is, when the title of the property has changed hands from sellers and buyers.

* Expired listings. These are listings that did not sell during the listings period and usually indicate the market’s “high water” mark. If a home doesn’t sell during a listing period, it’s likely that it was priced too high for the market.

Conducting a CMA on your own is often complicated and time-consuming. Why not save yourself the trouble and ask a local real estate agent to conduct the analysis? I have easy access to local listings and sales data in Wilmington, Leland, Hampstead, Castle Hayne, and surrounding areas. Your agent familiarity with the local market can affect the accuracy of a CMA, Particularly in a neighborhood with a lot of market variability.

 

To contact Nilesh Jethwa click here.

 Posted by Nilesh Jethwa, Wilmington, NC 

 Adapted from the Buffini and Company